Monday, February 7, 2011

Resentful

Yesterday was a bit stressful for me. Just getting "peopled out" mainly, but we were having a Superbowl party and I really needed to keep going even if I did get a bit moody. Ken's sister is visiting (love her) and so we have been engaged, which followed a pretty busy week with other "people encounters". Ken loves it, but I find myself needing alone time and space in order to regroup. I get drained, moody and......resentful?

I was thinking/praying about that this morning. Am I feeling resentful here? I thought yes...fleeting....but yes. And I don't want to. No. There is no reason for it....or should I say there is no place to direct it. I can't be resentful toward Kenny....the sweetest man I know....no, I cannot be resentful toward him. He didn't ask for ALS. He is going through this tough road with flying colors and no complaints. How could I hold resentment toward him? God? No...I have never been one to get mad or resentful toward God. He has been nothing but good and loving toward me. He knows me and always has my best in mind. Do I always like the path I am on? No...but even still, I cannot be resentful toward Him. And so...I think I have no room to let resentment abide in my heart. I see it fleetingly, but I will not, by God's grace, let it land. It saddens me that this has even come up....but then I think....this is pretty normal....don't let it get you down.

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